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Peeing
I have always had a broadminded attitude when it comes to our normal bodily functions. I guess that this comes from my upbringing at home. We had a large (double) shower, and would often shower together as a family. Seeing one another naked was not an unusual occurrence. Especially in the hot summer, when we would all strip off as soon as we got home, and skinny-dip in the pool together. We showered together as a family until my older brother left home to get married, and my older sister left home for university when I was about sixteen. Our family nakedness also extended to the bedrooms, and I think that the only time that I have ever worn sleeping attire was when I had a short stay in hospital. (I made it especially good to get home!). That was years ago, and I am now married to a wonderful husband, and twenty nine years old!
In the summer months, whilst at home, I am rarely found in clothes. I usually jump out of bed in the morning, and then off for a swim in the pool (naked of course!), straight into the shower (why get dry, only to get wet again?). After that it’s breakfast, and if I have to go to work, then on with the (minimum amount of) clothes. In the cooler mornings, I enjoy sitting naked in the window having my breakfast, as the warmth of the sun streams in through the full length window, and warms my entire body.
I first tried peeing standing up,whilst in the shower, a practice I continue most mornings. When I think back to those family showers, I seem to remember mum indulging in the practice too! As we now live in the country, and far enough away from the neighbours as to not have to worry about what I am (or mostly am not) wearing, I don’t need to wear clothing to hang out the washing, weed the garden, water the plants, or do the other chores. I found that it was much easier to stand up and pee, than to try to squat and aim on the lemon tree - just spread the legs a little, bend the knees a little, and a bit of a help with opening the outlet.
In the summer, I usually spend about an hour a day lying around the pool improving my (all over) suntan. I catch up with a little reading, have lunch, and then jump in the pool to cool off before getting back to the chores. One day when in the pool, I was surprised by a visit from the lady next door. She had not long moved in, and I wasn’t quite sure how to react, as I was skinny dipping as usual. It was very hot, and I didn’t think that she had seen my nakedness due to the glare off the water. I said “Come in and join me” she replied “But I don’t have a bathing costume”. “Neither do I” I said, standing up, revealing my wet boobs. “Why not,” she said “I havn’t been skinny dipping for years!”, and stripped off and jumped in. After about an hour together, we got out, and then had a cup of coffee together in the nude. I found out that she was a “jay-bird” ie liked to do the housework in the nude. Since that time, neither of us have never been embarrassed when the other one visits!
and we are in the buff. In fact, whenever we visit each other, the first things we do is to put on the kettle and take off our clothes!
Not very long ago, I started a new job in a small, but multistorey office. The ladies toilet was two floor down, although there was a men’s room on every floor. Working late one night, and after 6 cups of coffee, I was absolutely desperate for a pee. As no-one was around, I went to the men’s room. I couldn’t resist trying out the urinal. They had one of those “bowl types” that come out a fair way from the wall - just perfect for a women to use!. I usually stand up in the ladies and pee into the bowl, but this was even better.
If I am just going out casually, I rarely wear underclothing (knickers or bra) under my cotton dress. However, at work I feel that this might not quite be appropriate. I have found that a slight modification to my knickers makes it really easy to pee standing up. I cut the knickers between the legs, and sew in a piece of velcro to joint them together again. [Be careful to use cotton thread not nylon, and don’t make the velcro too long, as it prickles against your legs!! I put the join towards the rear, rather than the front, as this makes it much easier to hold it out of the way whilst peeing]. It is then quite a simple and quick process - just up with the dress, open the knickers, two fingers to open the slot whilst holding the knickers out of the way, and away wee go (pardon the pun).
One morning, I was working very early at the office. I was in the men’s bathroom (I had assumed no one else was around), and was using the urinal, when one of the guys came in. After his initial shock reaction and gasp, he smiled and said “Well I never knew girls could do that!” About an hour later, I bumped into him again at the coffee machine. He blushed. I said “Sorry if I embarrassed you this morning”. He replied “Not at all - I thought that I had embarrassed you. I was more surprised rather than embarrassed to find you there.” We both laughed, and had a good coffee together. After some discussion, and my explaining that the ladies was two floors down, he suggested that I should use the men’s room all of the time. Since that time, I have often used the men’s room during the day, and quite often used the urinal when I need a pee.
I have always looked a bit “boyish”, and when I go out casually with my husband, we often dress just in jeans, cotton flannelette shirt, and sloppy pullover. With the shorter hairstyles for women these days, I could easily be mistaken as a guy. Whilst I am reasonably well endowed in the boobs department (34” C), they are hard to see under the loose fitting clothing, as I usually go bra-less. When I do wear a bra, it is usually a push-up type, when I want to show them off with a plunge neckline.
When we are out, my husband and I often go to the toilet together, as I am rarely identified as a women in the casual gear, and can easily enter into the men’s room. I wear jeans with deep pockets, which makes it easy to hide my “Fresh-ette”. This is a “pee funnel”, which makes it very easy to use the urinals without removing your clothing. My husband and I modified mine, with some soft rubber hose that was light brown in color. It looks, and even feels like a penis. (We even tied a clear thread about an inch from the end, which gives it a realistic looking “knob”). When I walk into the men’s room, I leave my hand in my pocket as I walk up to the urinal. I then unzip my fly, and quickly insert the pee funnel. It is really easy to direct the pee against the urinal, and a good shake at the end gets rid of the drips. Back up with the zip, and the pee funnel back into the pocket. If no-one is around, then I usually rinse it out whilst I wash my hands.
I rarely use the ladies rooms when I am out these days, unless I have my period and need to change my tampon. On one particular day that I can remember, I was visiting the city on my own. I went to a mens room, and was standing at the stall peeing. I noticed that the guy in the stall next to me seemed to be taking particular notice of me, and was continuing to glance sideways. I’m not sure whether he suspected that I was a woman, or if he was just having a perve. I finished first, and gave my (artificial) willie a good shake to get rid of the drips. (I have found that this is a normal practice in the men’s room, and has a bit of a ritual status with the guys). As I pulled out my pee funnel and put it into my pocket, the guy next door was continuing to perve at me. When he saw what I did, his jaw dropped, and he turned his head to watch me as I moved away from the stalls. As he did, he lost his concentration on what he was doing, and sprayed pee all over the front of his trouse!
rs. I couldn’t help laughing, and said in my most feminine voice “serves you right, for perving!”. He was speachless. I’m not sure what happened next, as I moved out whilst he was still finishing.
The pee funnel is a really useful thing to have around, and I rarely go anywhere without it. When we are travelling, I often use it when we stop for a cup of coffee on the side of the road, or when we go walking in the bush (Unless of course, I am wearing a dress, then I just lift up the dress and go standing behind a tree if there is one). It sure beats standing in those long lines at the ladies rooms at sporting events or fairgrounds. Unfortunately it doesn’t help much when I’m dressed up to the nine’s (with my push-up bra) at the theatre, and I look like a women! Then I’m a bit shy about going to the men’s room, but I still stand up in the ladies, with my modified knickers.
When my husband and I were first married, we would often go camping together. One particular weekend, we were camped in a quiet campground with only two or three other groups in the entire (rather large) campground. There was a toilet block not too far from where we were camped, and another one up the other end where the other campers were settled. We were lementing the fact of not showering together for a few days, then we both looked at one another and both said at the same time “your place or mine!” We decided to toss a coin. I called “tails it’s boys, heads it’s girls”. Tails it was. This was an early experience for me in the men’s room, although I had sneaked into a couple of them to “check it out”. As we stripped off, my husband said he needed a pee, and walked naked up to the urinal and started to go. He suggested that I join him. I had never tried a urinal before, but was used to peeing standing up. This was one of the trough type urinals, and it had a step that you wo!
uld stand on to pee. It made it very hard to hit the wall, and I had to bend over backwards to make it. I also found that as I bent my knees, it was hard to get close enough without them touching the wall. Most of the pee went onto the step, and then ran into the trough. After that experience, we had a lovely shower together, and laughed about imagining the sight of a naked man and a naked women standing at the urinal together having a pee!!!
Girls, I hope that you have found this useful. Real girls can (and do) pee standing up!!
Guys, perhaps you have found this educational. Don’t be too embarrassed if you find a women in your bathroom one day, using “the facilities”.
One thing that I have found from visiting both the men’s and ladies rooms is that the girls have a long way to go in the graffiti department. You can spend hours in the men’s room reading the walls, and finding out who is doing what, and with whom. Unfortunately a lot of the stuff on the walls in the men’s room is homosexual by nature (which I despise). But there is a lot of funny stuff there. Most of the stuff in the girl’s bathroom is “Sally loves David” etc. So come on girls, write something interesting!!!!
name: Sue G.